do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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