i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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