dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize