he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
