Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Dear god my vagina.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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