So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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