i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize