its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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