you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
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