I heard we made out
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
someone owes me an orgasm
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize
