She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
