So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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