The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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