Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
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