i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
