Yo dont text me then not text me
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize