Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
