its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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