Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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