Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
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