Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Randomize
