Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
