Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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