dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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