Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
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