i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
