god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
