you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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