i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Randomize
