am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
You dont lie about slip and slides
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
i've created a new STD.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
