question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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