rhymes with "ouble enetration"
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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