so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
