oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Randomize
