Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Randomize
