Kiss
Puke
Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Randomize
