Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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