He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
