Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
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