dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
