Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
