Kareoke will never be a sober sport
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
