My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
sex in a hospital.. check
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
