just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
