i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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