Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
