On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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