I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
