I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
