1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
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